Living on Gigging

A little update on this blog, the word “gig” and what it is for me, and what I hope for it can be for you (plus an exploration into allowing curiosity to lead you back to your passion).

Living on Gigging

I started this blog, Living On Gigging, over 8 years ago while I was touring the United States and Europe, promoting my records, singing my songs, and trying with all my might to gain the love of strangers. It was a half-decade of trying to put myself on the map of humanity in the only way I thought I knew how.

I lived gig-to-gig.

Dating was dismissed as a distraction.

I spent much time saying “yes” to whatever gig I could get, playing to a lot of empty rooms, traveling in lonely car rides, and operating with eye-on-the-prize focus (which came with a complete set of big ole blinders).

One could say I was flailing. There was a lot of trial and error. Continue reading →

Is it possible to get a “yes” every time you make a request? Maybe. Is it possible to get a response every time? Absolutely.

It used to be a major struggle to get a reply back after sending an email to a company, venue, a potential collaborator or producer, or literally anyone. I found myself wishing for them to just say “no” rather than nothing at all.

I also struggled with how to be personal but also save time. Writing to 30 music venues a day asking for a date was getting tedious but I knew copy-and-paste would start to feel spammy. Also, I noticed that even when making tentative plans with friends or family, I never got solid yes’s or no’s. So I did some research on why this was and found a few things I was missing.

Due to my list-making nature, I put this 8-step process together. It’s called The Perfect Pitch. And I tested it. And fine tuned it.

And good news- it works! I’ve shared it with other people and THEY said it works.

I’ve used it for getting gigs, placing music in TV shows, raising $30k through fan-funding, and getting paid a higher fee for a scoring project. The number of responses I receive has dramatically increased, as has the number of yes’s!

So, here’s the process of crafting your perfect pitch… and being powerful in making requests so that you not only get a response, you get a YES. Give it a whirl and let me know in the comments below how it goes! (PS, the more detailed and more video version of this is in my Skillshare Course which you can get here. You also can get it free with the monthly subscription to the In The Key Elite– a small group of musicians working towards kicking butt in their careers.)

The Perfect Pitch (Getting a Yes)

1) Intention – Before you sit down to write the email or make that call, you need to know what you want the result to be. If you’re asking for a job, you probably want to first have an interview. Do you want someone to listen to a song and give you feedback? Do you want to be signed? Most of my cold-call emails are about having a conversation first.

2) Get Related – Now that you’re IN the communication itself (whether an email, phone call, or even in person), make sure to let that person know how you found them- were you referred by a friend? Did you do a Google search, looking for great licensing agencies, and they caught your eye? Let them know! If you are already familiar with this person, this is a good time to ask a personal question, show that you’re interested. This is 1 sentence and not about you.

3) Struggle – Right now, without you in their life, there is a struggle. Reaching out to music supervisors, I make the assumption that they are looking for the best song for the next episode of the show and have a pile of music to listen through. Or trying to plan a family reunion? Right now, without you starting this conversation, everyone goes on with their lives and doesn’t connect. You’re setting up the problem so you can then provide a solution. Again, this is not about you. 1-2 sentences.

4) What’s Possible? Here is where you paint a picture about what is possible. You are not yet offering a solution, but just getting the reader/listener to see this pretty picture. For the music supervisor: going home early on a Friday. For the family reunion- fun times catching up, growing closer, some great family photos. 1-2 sentences.

5) The Solution – Aka, what opportunity are you offering (this is not a request, merely a statement). For the music supervisor- Look no more! I’ve listened to the show and have two great songs that would fit perfectly within the vibe and mood the show’s exhibited. For your family reunion – I’m offering to plan a family reunion. 1 sentence.

6) Specific Yes/No Request – This will be a question that they will answer yes or no to. They may also offer another option. For example “Will you be able to listen to these two songs by tomorrow and have a call at 4pm EST about collaborating?” Or “Are you available to come to a family reunion at Bryant Park on Saturday June 3rd at 10:00am?” One key thing to note- you want to make the reader/listener do AS LITTLE work as possible. Don’t ask them when they’re free to talk. Then they have to go through their calendar, think of what they haven’t added in, and you’re way less likely to get a response. 1 question.

7) Closing – As you would any proper communication, say goodbye. End with something that shows you’re interested and looking forward to collaborating, to seeing each other, etc etc. 1 sentence. In your signature, make sure to have your phone number, and any links to important websites. Don’t put links to social media sites you’re not active on. Pick one.

8) Follow-up – If you hear no response in the first week, follow up with a quick email asking if they’ve received your communication. COPY THE ORIGINAL EMAIL below so they don’t have to search for it. Then start again at #6- make that request! If you don’t hear back after the first followup, send another, asking for permission to continue to followup, stating that you understand they must be extremely busy. This is where I get 75% of my responses that turn into conversations!

If you do the math, these are NOT very long and verbose communications, and they are not all about you trying desperately to sell yourself. You don’t even get to talk about you until #5, or even 6 depending on how you word things.

You can use this format in your social media posts. Don’t say weak things like “Check out my new video”. No one’s brain is thinking “YES” or “NO”. There is nothing specific, there is no opportunity. Try something else, like playing a game of getting 100 new views by the end of the day, and go through this process. The opportunity is that they get to WIN. (Hint: people love winning games). The request is “will you view and share this video before 5pm EST today?”

Last thing… don’t be surprised if you get more responses… including no’s. This is a good thing- it means you can stop wondering if so-and-so got your email. You can ask them if following up in a few weeks/months works for them. You have a relationship now, and even if they’re not interested in what you’re currently offering, they may be. Or they will tell you. With more no’s comes more yes’s! Now just followup and build the relationship and watch the results flow in!

I’m starting to understand how the ever-elusive energy plays a bigger role in my life than I thought. In a recent post, I shared about my recent experience of moving houses. I was desperately trying to set up my next (and hopefully “forever”) workspace with positive energy, differently than I had in the past. Weeks after my husband had unpacked and organized his mountain guiding business’ space, I was still stuck in creating my ideal writing, recording, and working space. While I never considered myself a hoarder or a messy person, I thought maybe it was time to clear the clutter.

In my previous house and in my Harlem apartment (the lease to which I just let run out after 12 years), my “studio” space was part recording studio, part computer central, part writing space, part webinar-giving, book-writing, and song-pitching space. I found that in my apartment, despite being 1/3 the size of my next space, I was ready and eager to work. A yoga teacher friend referred to it as a “peaceful zen space”. When I moved outside the city and got my first taste of big rooms, I felt like I had to take advantage of the space and blow out the writing area, the recording area, the computer area and fill it with gear, couches, books. I never actually used the room for the string octets, drum circles, and choirs I had imagined myself recording. (I dream big, what can I say?) Ultimately, I felt lost in it. I found myself gazing out the windows my corner desk faced directly. I felt unproductive and underwhelmed. Yet when new visitors came into my studio I heard a lot of “wow, this is so awesome!”. When my dad first saw my new studio a few months before passing, he said “now this is what they call cool.”

The battle that ensued in my head included various voices saying things like “you brat, you have this big gorgeous space, who are you to say you don’t like it” and “a space shouldn’t define your inspiration. just write” and “you’re just not good at designing” and “maybe I just have lost my passion”.

Enter new house.

Smaller, with more charm, more sun, and more decisions for me to make. I knew I wanted to stop trying to be a recording studio and be in a space that did inspire me to work, write, and be expressed. I knew it was possible but I didn’t know how.

Enter Emma.

The one person who taught me that you can draw energy from your space, if done right, and it’s not wrong to want your space to give you something back. That to clear the clutter isn’t easy, but it’s incredibly effective.

I first met Emma when Joanna, my Harlem roommate, invited her over. Joanna had told me that she was an Empath- a highly sensitive individual with the ability to read others’ emotions and even physical states without the need to speak. When we sat down together, she said, “ooh, you have some pain in your lower left back.” Why yes, yes I do. Which turned into a conversation about me being freelance and taking on a lot of “masculine” energy responsibilities, and needing to lean into my femininity a bit more to help strike a balance (and probably an improved married life).

Emma is a gorgeous, pixie-meets-good-witch five-foot-shorter-than-me dancer. While she’s not auditioning for her next Broadway show, she’s a professional organizer who will come into your room and tell you what items need to be tossed because they are holding you down, energetically. I thought it was a bit hippy-dippy but being someone who’s open to what I don’t know, I thought it could be an interesting take on setting up my new workspace. Anyway, I was stuck, so why not?

I gave Emma a call, and she ended up coming up to my house and staying overnight. During those 28 hours together, I discovered many things about myself, about what I held on to, about what I should let go, about colors, energy, and how to make space for what I really want. Besides the energy work we did and the conversations we had that provided many insights into myself, Emma also unpacked 6 boxes of kitchen stuff, perfectly assigning each item to its proper (and simply perfect) location, helped me detach from items and filled my station wagon with Salvation Army donations.

Here’s what I learned about using and clearing energy:

Photographs in a room bring you back to a time when you weren’t as developed as you are now. You’re bringing the energy of those moments into your current life, leaving little space to create the present moment from nothing. Photos belong in halls and stairways, where you are passing through these moments, can acknowledge them, but not allow them enough time to get a hold on you.
Items, like paintings, vases, clothes, knick nacks, curtains, and pillows, hold energy. Some of it is positive, some neutral, and some too strong to be beneficial. I found that the items Emma reacted the most strongly to were the things I knew I had to get rid of, on a very subconscious level. It’s like when your personal trainer tells you to stop eating scones and you’re like “NOOOOO. Oh wait. Yeah, I didn’t really like them anyway”.
Some items like plaques or awards, mix tapes made for old boyfriends, which I were SURE would be going to the trash pile, were items that held a positive energy which acted as an acknowledgment of my work and progress. They got to stay and were placed in spots that worked within the room.
Rooms have energy. Corners have personalities. When Emma walked into my workspace, she pointed and said “that’s the prosperity corner. We need to move the desk there”. Done. And I can’t believe the difference it made. Not looking out a window, but with windows all around me. An elegant white rug (Emma made me get) and a very glamorous feel and suddenly I’m drawn to the space like I’ve never been before. It feels like a version of me that’s been hiding out for a while.
Colors can work in your favor or against you. Purple is success and prosperity. Good thing my desk chair is purple. Blues are for communication. Good to have in a master bedroom for the marriage. Yellow is binding, not to be mixed in the master bedroom when you want open communication. But good for tieing a bow around my childhood stuffed toy, keeping the energy of my whole life bound to that item and not allowing all the memories to permeate my bedroom or marriage. Our red front door had to go, it was a source of combative energy. I promptly painted it a slate/lavender.
Flowers need to be everywhere for me. They are nature’s vaginas. They exude sexuality and femininity. Energetically, they spread that energy to me, act as a reminder of being open, and who I am in my best moments. Flowers are now a weekly part of our shopping budget.

When Emma was done, she walked around the house burning a bundle of dried sage. I thought “hey, if I’m going to do this, may as well do this the whole way, hippy dippy as it may be.” She taught me how to “clear” the house after a guest or a fight or any energy-altering event by burning the sage. I’m doing this process 100%. What do I have to lose?

The results from my work with Emma are my own. If she came into your apartment or house, there’s a good chance you’d have completely different results, breakthroughs, and discoveries. Within four days of my weekend with Emma, I got four composing jobs, direct to client. My ideal jobs. Jobs I’ve been yearning for and haven’t had for over 8 months. I’m now working the way I want to. Not just doing work to get work. My next step is to have a consultant IT come to my space and optimize my backup systems and acoustical room treatment. Again. Why not set myself up forever and 100%? Clear the way. I’m finally ready for me.

It’s Monday at 6:37 am and I woke up to an email, like I so often do, with a link to a new blog post by one of the writers I read. Derek Sivers had just posted part one of his “Do This: Directives“. I didn’t click on any links, I just read the article, taking it for face value. While reading, I had moments where I thought it must be April Fools Day or an Onion piece. Other times I was nodding my head. In other words, I was a bit confused and taken aback. My initial reaction was that this was a bold piece of writing, which I applaud. It was also mildly dangerous, egomaniacal and for being such a broad list, I thought it was missing some key “directives”.

But then I clicked on the link that set the whole thing up. It’s the only link Derek asks you to click on (all the other links passively direct you to past articles). And he sets it up as such: he’s read so many books to help move forward and has essentially taken the key take-away points and put them into directions. Not necessarily real actions to take, but do’s and don’ts of advice boiled down from others’ opinions, research, findings, stories, and ideas.

As an avid progress-seeker myself, I too had a library of books that promised insights into myself, life lessons, or practices of my chosen industry (music). I wish I thought to make key-take-away notes! (I did this in college – I boiled every single class down to a single page of notes… I still have a single 1/2″ binder of my entire college education.)

The motivation behind the article I read upon waking up is now crystal clear, makes perfect sense, and is a brilliant idea. So why am I still writing this article?

Because of the other morning non-clicking readers like me who may read Derek’s article without clicking. Because of the possibility that all of the tips from all of the books Derek compiled into the cliff notes of all cliff notes, when combined, don’t actually make for an actionable plan that will accomplish anything. Because there may be more to add to the list. Because there are some things on the list that, when taken out of context of the whole book it was referencing, don’t translate to something to do when creating your own fulfilling life. Because I know that most of my readers are musicians and that by posting this they’ll probably go read the article (an indication of the value I see in it) and I want to be responsible for the fact that I know there are alternative points of view to many of the “directives”.

I’m not like Derek in the sense that I have not made a company and sold it for $22 million (though I did use said company to distribute some of my records), nor do I have 6 figures worth of followers on Twitter. But I am someone who’s paving my own path in a crazy industry and committed to growth, self-expression, and creativity along the way. And I don’t just try to be self-expressed and creative, I advocate for it. This whole blog is how I go about doing it, from my perspective. Nothing I say is necessarily fact, just a point of view. So why even read the list below when someone as successful as Derek has made such a concise alternative list?

You may be curious. You may be more like me than Derek. You may also be committed to growth, which means being open to as many points of view as possible (which is one reason why I think [and hope] Derek won’t be offended by this post). Perhaps you know that the list Derek wrote will produce a certain lifestyle, one that isn’t yours. Perhaps, between our two lists, Derek and I can provide a MegaDoThisList for a variety of options on how to move through the murky waters of life. I can see the argument behind every single point in Derek’s list. I do not agree with them all. My list is meant to merely provide alternatives and additions. It’s not quite a point-by-point response to Derek’s article, but I did use his as inspiration and followed along. My list is based on my own studies, experiences and experiments. It’s different than Derek’s. But his list inspired this, so Derek, thank you.

Okay, that’s enough disclosures to last until dinner so why don’t I hop to it. Here’s my response to Derek’s Siver’s “Do This” list… Do This Instead:

How to be a contribution

1. Declare your purpose in the world

The more you are crystal clear on what you’re all about, the more likely you are to attract the right partners in life.
A clear purpose (or committment, or mission, etc) can be a compass for what actions and opportunities to take.
The opposite is trying to see what works (like throwing spaghetti against the wall and seeing what sticks – there’s no intention and you make a mess)

2. Pursue a career that you love

When you become successful at you do, you will become a role model.
You can use your success to leverage opportunities for others (either financially or otherwise).

3. Share what you’re passionate about

No one is ever offended or bored by hearing someone passionate about what they do talk about it. In fact, the more you do, the more you’re likely to inspire someone else to change their course for the better.

4. Be expensive and be generous.

There is no reason to not charge what you are worth (or, if you’re like me, charge more than you think you’re worth as we sometimes undermine our value).
When you see someone who could benefit from something you normally charge for, consider giving it away.
Giving away what you make or what you provide every once in a while keeps the very thing you’re creating fresh and reminds you that you created it for a purpose.

How to become successful

1. Live wherever you are inspired

Living anywhere else will just contribute to a sense of unsettlement, a loss of self, and the need for more.
Don’t be afraid to hop on a bus, plane or in your car to get to the events, meetings, and the scene you want to be a part of at that moment.
Returning home is grounding. It is a reminder of what you’ve created. It is a take-off and landing strip, powered by your accomplishments. It’s a break from the rat race.

2. Say yes to everything that is in line with the purpose you’ve declared for yourself and your life

Don’t compromise on what you’re committed to, big picture. This is when people will start to take advantage and you will lose yourself.
Say yes to things that you’re aligned with even when you don’t feel like it
Learn to ignore your feelings… they get in the way of the actions you’ll take that’ll lead you to success.
Present an opportunity to other people and don’t just look for who can help you.

3. Diversify

Learn “cousin” skills (skills that are related to your passion and will give you leverage engineering if you’re a composer, teaching if you’re a guitarist, a second language if you tour internationally)
When you have a slump in one area of your life, turn to your other skills to get yourself out of it.

4. Create your niche

Figure out what you love. Figure out what you can sell doing what you love (A product? Service? Experience?). Find the people who need what you can offer.
Create balance in your schedule – time for being an artist, time for running your business and being fiscally responsible.
Only make a career out of what you love. When it pays you, you will fall more deeply in love.

5. Fake it until you make it

Be humble in accepting feedback
Speak like you already are what you’re trying to become (“I’m a composer” versus “I’m trying to be a composer”)
Be okay with where you are now and cut yourself some slack

6. Make ideas reality

Have an idea and then follow through.
Do whatever it takes to realize the idea, as if the idea’s life depends on it… because it does.
Don’t be afraid of what other people will think – looking good will keep you small.
A rule of capitalism: whoever takes the most financial risk gets the rewards.
Do not sell your copyright to anything unless you are 100% sure of the returns.

7. Be human and interact as such

Do your research. Know who you’re getting into business with, not in a creepy, background check kind of way, but more of a “how are your kids doing in their new school” kind of way.
Don’t be afraid to share what makes you nervous, tentative or frustrated. Sharing with “I feel that….” at the beginning and “Am I totally off base here?” can work wonders.

How to deal with unpredictability

1. Give up trying to control the future

The unknown and uncertainty can be a great source of anxiety.
Taking actions that will directly move you forward is the most powerful way to combat unpredictability
If predictability is something you value highly, create elements of your life that you can predict (like how clean you leave your car, your weekly calendar – schedule your tasks every sunday and your week will be somewhat predictable)

2. Make future-thinking decisions

Save a % of your monthly income.
Invest in yourself
Ask yourself if the year-from-now-you will be happy with this decision.

3. Know what you have, what you spend, what you need

The more related you are to your assets and finances, the less you’ll be spending on things you think you need.
Own what you want to own, as long as everything you’ve purchased was done so in cash.
Eliminate any debt.

4. Have integrity

Be responsible for where you live (be part of a community) and what you said (you are allowed to change your mind)
Acknowledge the past, as it got you to the present
Be present while creating your ideal future
Loyalty pays off – in the form of miles, points, favors and respect

5. Be flexible in planning

Create a game plan, and know that, since it’s your game, you can change the rules.
Change rules when needed.
No plan can lead to listlessness, aimlessness, and trouble fulfilling on your purpose. Don’t be afraid to plan and change it.

How to be a compassionate human being

1. Treat others as you’d like to be treated

If you are someone who wants to teach, then learn.
If you are someone who like excitement and spontaneity, then create it
Treat everyone like it’s their last day here. (Love this from Derek’s original post)

2. Be what you’re committed to

Whether it’s self-expression, love, light, peace, creativity, inspiration, if you are your commitment, you will be the same no matter where you are or with whom.

3. Embrace the differences between genders

Men and women are not the same.
*When women try to be like men (powerful, aggressive, masculine) it comes off as controlling and bitchy. Ladies – your power source is your femininity (don’t believe me? Just think of a time when you were the MOST confident bestest version of yourself- hint, it may have been an amazing sexual experience – were you vulnerable, beautiful, confident, smart or aggressive and macho?)
*Men who try to be like women (access their feminine side, talk about feelings, process out loud) lose a sense of themselves and their survival-based ego (all important in male success). (*This is based on hunter-gatherer anthropological and ontological studies of my yester-years)

4. Be open to new connections

You are different from who you were yesterday. Meet someone today who likes the new you.
Keep people around who appreciate your growth.

5. Give up the need to be right all the time

If you’re married then you know that being right sometimes isn’t as important as the marriage. And that’s okay.
The same goes with other important relationships, whether band mates, business partners, family members, or your pet.
Any relationship can be mended with communication.

6. Be great with people

Nothing gives you a right to take out your feelings and emotions, no matter what the circumstances, on someone else.
Accept people 100% for both who they are and who they are not.
Only offer advice when asked. If you’re not sure if someone is venting or looking for advice, then ask them.

7. Be open-minded.

Really. Don’t just have opinions and spew them. Listen.

8. Don’t be afraid of endings

When a relationship no longer serves you, and in fact, starts to drain your energy, have a conversation to end it.
You can always have another conversation to revitalize the relationship.

How to be good at being successful

1. Define your version of “success”.

If you don’t know what success means to you, you won’t be able to acknowledge where you are.
Listen to other people when they tell you “you are a success”. At some point, you’ll start believing them.

2. Do more of what works and less of what doesn’t

If it works, figure out why. Repeat.
If it didn’t work, figure out why. Post-mortems are often the most valuable part of a process.
Keep trying new things, but do so with intention, purpose, and a plan behind it (or we go back to that spaghetti/wall sitch)

How to mess it all up

1. Lose track of your commitment

If you keep your purpose / committment present in your life – even just a sticky note on your desk as a daily reminder – you will continue to take actions that serve others as well as yourself. (This is the cornerstone of MX4)
Let your default ways of being take over. The lazy, the controlling, the anxious, the fear of success ways.
Let your feelings run the show. Feelings will get in the way of effective actions every single time.

2. Compare yourself to your friends/idols/past self

Inspiration and mentorship is one thing. Jealousy and masochistic comparison is another. Don’t do it.
Comparing will take you off your unique course. No one else is on it so why compare?

3. Throw your money away

Renting is a good idea if you value freedom and flexibility over stability, investment, and roots. At the very least, talk to a financial advisor.
Spend money on things that promise exposure but have no way to quantify the results.

4. Don’t acknowledge the small steps

Acknowledging others and receiving praise and acknowledgment about the steps you’ve made should be a weekly ritual. Not doing so will create distance between what you’ve accomplished so far, even if it isn’t the ultimate goal.

5. Don’t be responsible for yourself

This is really what inspired me to write this whole article: if you aren’t responsible for finding out what you want in the world, learning about how to achieve it, for creating your own future both in your career and in your finances, then you will end up blaming everyone else and the world, and no one wants to play with that kid.

It’s been a little bit since my last post and that’s due to the two facts that SXSW consumed my life for two weeks, and that my husband and I were selling our house and purchasing a new one. My mind has been on how to make better design decisions that will cater to my work-from-home lifestyle as a full-time musician.

SXSW was great. It was the first time in a few years I was there officially during the Music portion (previous years had me attending the Interactive week, speaking about the best uses of music in branding and marketing). I was jolted back to musical life, watching musicians pour their hearts and souls into every performance, every conversation, looking for every bit of what’s possible for them in their career. It was inspiring. And I remember all of it like it was yesterday. I didn’t perform this year. I was observing. I was speaking (about branding for musicians). I was chatting, networking, meeting, reuniting.

And it was a glorious break from packing, reading over home-purchasing contracts and dealing with ornery real estate agents (not mine!).

When I returned from SXSW, I started to break down my studio. I decided how I was going to streamline my next setup to be more writer-friendly, less recording-centric. (I was fully capable of recording an 8-piece band, in a large space with XLR cables snaked through the sound-treated floor. I used this capability exactly 0.0 times in 3 years. So I’m selling some stuff.) I decided that my next home was going to have a sunny co-working space type of feel, instead of a darker, stereotypically mixer/engineer feel. I decided that I wanted to be closer to the rest of the house, not tucked away in a shady corner. I decided that I wanted to work in close proximity to my husband, when he wasn’t guiding a client up a mountain.

I decided to end my lease in Harlem. To put 100% of my time and energy in to managing my next home, rather than handle two spaces in the city and country. My rent-stabilized 3-bedroom apartment served me and my many friends who dwelled within its tall walls well for 12 years. I decided it truly is time to gather up my $200 upright piano, my favorite bed duvet, head back to the country… and focus.

Here’s a before of what I’m calling “headquarters” in my new house. Today, flooring people are coming to install hard wood floors, I’m buying paint, and working on finding a sliding barn door as an option to close it off, if need be. With sun on three sides and just off the kitchen, I will not be at a loss for inspiration, light, inclusiveness, and productivity in my new work-from-home space.

I will post the after picture as soon as we’re done.

Thank you for reading a bitty insight from this full-time, work-from-home musician. I’d love to hear any thoughts you have on your work space below!

(Written for and originally published on Sharp Heels)

One of my first jobs out of college was as a tech at a recording studio. All the engineers were male, all the producers were male. No biggie. Years later, I become a commercial freelance composer. Again, ad agencies, music houses and other composers: mostly male. Still, no biggie.

Then, I visit Paris. Oh la la. I meet with boutique ad agencies and production companies who claim they are “full service agencies,” yet do not provide music for their branding clients. I speak with their CEOs about offering this service. And they are 75% female.

In Paris, everything is luxury. Luxury branding, luxury markets. I thought, oh, advertising in Paris is more female-dominated. No biggie. Also, not true.

Here’s the truth: Luxury is a niche market that is based on feelings and experiences – and always positive. Cruise lines, jewelry/luggage brands and high-end hotels like to evoke experiences of romance, excitement and unfettered relaxation. Mainstream advertising, in general, is starting to catch up to what luxury brands were onto years ago, in that they are tapping into empathy, human experiences, and moving away from an industrial and corporate methodology. (I mean, did you watch the Superbowl this year? How many ads were pulling on heart strings?).

So who is most in touch with their feelings and how to express them? Women. (Yes, this is a stereotype — but it is also biological and grounded in evolution. I could write volumes on this but for the purposes of this article, play along.)

And what is the one element in the world that can alter emotions in less than a second? Music. (No argument here. Ever watch Jaws without the soundtrack? Not so scary. Or Superbowl ads? Not so sad.)

Music’s Startling Influence on Branding

So…I speak at SXSW in March of 2014, to a room full of entrepreneurs, marketers, startups, etc. and learn that everyone is baffled that music is so important in how people remember visual branding. Like, it would have never crossed their minds to incorporate it into their marketing initiatives. So I’m up against a bit of mainstream educational challenges. “Increasing awareness of music as a branding tool” is next on my to-do list. What do I need? Facts. Case studies. Proof.

There have been many scientific studies done on music’s effect on memory, productivity, and emotions. Here are just a few of their findings:

When music was played in the workplace, keypad operator’s productivity increased 18.6% and errors decreased by 37%.
When fast music was played in a supermarket, sales increased by 38%.
When German music was played in a wine store, more German wine was purchased. When the music was switched to French music, more French wine was purchased.
Alzheimer’s patients are able to remember songs from their childhood because music is stored in a different place in the brain from visual memories.
Your brain can finish a song once you start hearing it because of this separate memory compartment, called the Auditory Cortex, just for music

After Proof, Comes Application

Since the internet has finally caught up to video, multimedia marketing is ubiquitous. So I expanded my research to include the importance of videos in selling. And it turns out production quality (which includes a custom-made music element) is paramount. Here are a few baffling facts I found about videos:

Video appears in 70% of the top 100 search results listings
Viewers are 64-85% more likely to buy after watching a product video
75% of users visit the marketer’s website after viewing a video
Real estate listings with videos receive 403% more inquiries than those without video
Your website is 50 times more likely to appear on the first page of a search engine result page if it includes video
Professionally produced video optimized for eCommerce outperforms user-generated video (read- DIY) by 30%

Now, all of this being said, it really comes down to this: What do you want the customer to feeland do after they view or hear your video or ad?

The key point is that feelings drive actions, plain and simple: provide the right music for your viewers, and you can alter their emotions. And you don’t even need to “speak” music.

I formulated a Brand Assessment Form to help clients find words to define and hone how to express their brand. Once this form is filled out, I — as their “sonic branding composer” — have all the information I need to create a piece of music that is perfectly aligned with their brand, fills any messaging holes, and increases their overall image and value.

Now this year at SXSW, I got the opportunity to provide a workshop geared towards folks looking to increase the impact of their branding. I showed a few examples of sonic logos (the short musical bit that is the auditory equivalent of a graphic logo), of “audio branding” that is aligned with the company. I also provided an example of terribly mis-aligned audio branding.

The latter is very important, because alignment is a word I love when it comes to branding. Your brand assets (logo, tag line and video music) can be saying one thing, while the content of your business — what you provide, how you deliver it, and the overall experience — can be saying something completely different, which not only makes your customer do more work to understand you, it decreases production value, and has potential customers questioning your products’ quality. You also miss on an opportunity to really say – and strongly reinforce — what your company’s message is! For example, if you’re providing a video course on how to gain financial stability and peace of mind, you don’t want your intro-graphic and logo to be a heart-thumping, scary, trailer-like clip, right? The two aspects just don’t belong together.

Armed with these new facts, the notion that empathy is currently driving advertising, and that music can alter emotions (thus motivating specific actions, with the end goal of prompting the customer to buy your product), the logical next step is to consider how these valuable facts can improve your brand’s awareness with the public.

When you are clear on how to talk about your brand, you can then be clear on how your branding assets should look and sound so that they relay the right emotional message. A focus on this crucial element in advertising – and how women can best contribute to it – is a worthwhile place to start in this new area of inquiry.

It’s 1:13 am Thursday January 15th, just a few hours after performing with a band for my record release. All I want to do is go to sleep. Well, watch one episode of The Office, then go to sleep. But tomorrow I won’t be basking in whatever glow (or cloud) that is the experience of having just played for a live audience. If I reflect back on tonight’s live show tomorrow, then it will be more like a schedule of how the day went down, the circumstances, what happened and with whom. The rawness will be missing. Right now it is raw. And to do this essay series ANY justice, I must write now.

Honestly, I’m numb. I’m not giddy, I’m not anxious, I’m not overly happy, or utterly disappointed. There’s a slight hint of satisfaction, of feeling accomplished. But only slight. I knew I could pull it off. This wasn’t a surprise. I meant, I’ve coordinated full-band tours hopping trains through Germany and Switzerland to get to sound checks on the sides of mountains. I wrote and rehearsed a vocal string piece for my own wedding that involved 8 strings, 7 singers and a conductor. A fourth record release show? This, I could do.

Photo by Ace Patricks

With pleasantly surprised, excited, recharged, mellow, happy, and sad off the table, I’m lying in bed thinking: what am I feeling?

And why the heck do I care so much?

Perhaps it’s because I wanted to feel something bigger when the first guitar chords swelled in and the bass slid into place in between the kick drum and my right hand’s piano part. I was waiting for it. I was watching myself. I knew I was going to write this essay and I wanted to be accurate. Maybe I wasn’t being present with all the watching.

In the sound check, I was noticing myself feeling more gentle with my voice than I had in past years. I often found myself fighting the band or just the mix. Today, I was able to share my single “obnoxiously artistic request”: let the songs breathe, this is not about rocking out. Drummer Shawn Pelton was particularly musical today, and while this didn’t come as a surprise, since he is one of the most musical drummers I’ve ever had the honor to play with, rocking out is pretty much his middle name. So when he took my “it feels a little bombastic” comment to heart, it meant something for me.

I knew the show was going to go well as soon as I started singing during the sound check. It was a “good” vocal day. The musicians were on time. Everyone was prepared. I knew my struggle would be in the hour between sound check and when the show started. Putting makeup on in the dark bathroom, getting simultaneously claustrophobic and anxious, waiting, wondering if people were showing up. Even though three days before the show I declared “I no longer care about ticket sales!”, I did. It’s an old habit and it dies hard.

So I wonder if the numbness just comes down to not hitting my ticket sale goal. And that I’ve trained myself to be disappointed. To let the numbers and promotional time I spent carry greater value than it should.

I took times to look out at the audience. The room wasn’t packed, but it was full. They laughed at my banter, they sang along during my silly ukulele song.

They were silent.

Okay, as I wrote that last sentence, I realized what the biggest feeling I am feeling is… grateful. It’s not numbness. When I am truly and singularly grateful, I am present, I am at peace, I am content and wordless. As much as I would like to say I am grateful all the time around my career, I am not. I am always looking at what’s next. What could be better. I’m worrying. I have many words. I am not at peace or present.

Being grateful with a musical experience is new for me. And I’m going to let myself sit in this moment for a few quiet, uncomplicated and strategy-free days.

Update: I’m now in the process of mixing the live show audio and putting it to video, so check back here for the link. Also, check out a very well-written and detailed (And positive!) review of the live show on Punchland!

I’m deep in prep mode for my first full-band, real live show in three years. It’s a special show, one I wasn’t even going to do, but something was telling me you’re not done yet. It’s a record release show. And it’s draining the shit out of me.

The Venue

Getting the venue wasn’t so hard. I knew I wasn’t going to lug my keyboard through the streets of Manhattan mid-January so the venue had to have a piano. I didn’t want to stress too much about filling a huge room, so it had to be under 200 capacity. And I wanted it to be something familiar while also being a new experience. And of course, something borrowed and something blue.

I landed on Rockwood Music Hall. I have played Stage 1 a dozen times, so the request to play their bigger and nicer room, Stage 2 wasn’t a completely out-of-the-blue request. It would feel like a homecoming, as much as a way to start fresh, which is what my record, Inevitably was all about. At the same time, I hadn’t played in NYC in a while, I had no idea what my “draw” would be, so I had my PR folks reach out. In no time, I was on the phone with the booker negotiating a better door deal than their standard skim-off-the-top-then-take-a-% (sorry, musicians, Rockwood is slipping through the cracks and trying to stay alive, thus making their door deal slightly less than ideal for artists, especially first-timers in NYC who don’t know their draw). Anywho, we landed on a deal that felt a little better than shitty, and required me to sell advance tickets – 101 of them – before said deal kicked in. Oh well. On to making this show actually happen.
Note the timeline here: Venue was confirmed December 15th, 2015. Show was scheduled for January 14th, 2016. If you’re reading this before the show date, please do get tickets ahead of time to see how this all goes down.

Promotion

I was working with an indie PR company for the record release. They were getting me a few exclusive reviews and premiers of the videos we made for the record (Inevitably and Dissolve if you’re curious). Mid-December, we shifted to full-on live-show promotion. And for them, I’m not sure what that meant other that make sure the show gets in all the local listings.

The venue sent me a list of media contacts which I forwarded to said PR team, grateful for not having to start my personalized pitched to each one to either post or write about the show. I was left to do my own promotion. Something different that I’ve done in the past. I have more followers on social media. I started Periscope, I am in some engaging conversations on Twitter. This time will be better, thought the familiar hopeful indie musician voice in my head.

I stopped touring full time for a number of reasons, one of them being the massive pain in the ass it was to promote shows and then explain to bookers what you did and how many people you expect to come and the STRESS of it all. I never quite got it in New York City. Switzerland, now that’s another story, but let’s keep it local for now.

I hadn’t sold out a 200-ish venue in New York since my first CD release at The Cutting Room in 2004. Twelve years, four CDs, ten tours (US and European) and 300+ shows later, I’m hopeful. My new record is all co-writes and duets so most of the songs I’ll do at the show will have a special guest singer. I’m working with an all-star band of old friends including Shawn Pelton on drums (SNL, Sheryl Crow, Bruce Springsteen), Conrad Korsch on bass (Rod Stewart), and Oscar Rodriguez (A Great Big World, me!). I decided to do a social media post a day highlighting all of the awesome guests and band members- nine days in total if you include me, telling the story of how I know them, why I’m excited to play with them. I’m tagging and forwarding, retweeting and commenting.

And I’ve sold two tickets a day since I started 10 days ago.

Okay. No problem.

The Music

Breathe Cheryl. Let’s focus on the music. Not everyone in the band can rehearse. Okay cool. Skype rehearsals, Google docs of set lists, tempos and keys. Perfect charts. Written notes for the sound mixer. Stage plots. Cello parts. Me, learning songs I only pieced together in the studio for the record. Me, learning lyrics I wrote and sang once for a recording that happened over a year ago. Getting to know my writing again. My playing. My voice. Is it better? It’s worse. I know it’s worse. I’m out of practice. It sounds rough and scratchy. It sounds like you spent three years living life. Okay. I can live with that. I will stop trying so f*cking hard to sound good.

So while I’m at it, I may as well stop trying to look so good. That’s what’s driving the stress around selling tickets. What if people think the room looks empty? What if the band thinks I’m not a serious enough musician to fill a measly 170-capacity room? What if the venue doesn’t invite me back because I didn’t sell enough?

WHO CARES you don’t even know if you want to continue playing live.

True. At first I thought this show was just going to be a listening party. I thought the live thing was done done done. But I wanted to play these songs live. Just to see. I was curious. So I booked it and that was that. Then I started thinking this would be my BIG GLORIOUS RETURN TO THE STAGE. [*eye roll*] Oh please. Look how stressed you are about selling tickets and getting through the songs. You don’t want to do this. Plus it’s costing an arm and a leg for rehearsal space and paying the musicians (even though they are friends, they are pros, so I pay their asking rate. I do not negotiate with musicians.) And I don’t think I want to play this music alone. They are duets. Writing these songs was a process, a healing, a cry for help, a complaint, a get-it-out-of-your-system sort of cathartic structure that was temporarily created to serve a specific purpose. Performing the songs alone at solo shows feels inauthentic, like I am not doing the songs, or my collaborators, justice.

So then I thought that this show could be an official “goodbye” from the stage, so I can focus on writing, scoring films, creating great courses for musicians, being the entrepreneur and composer I know I can be.

But that didn’t feel right also. Sure, it may be the last show I do, perhaps for another three years, but why declare something like that and bind my future of performing to it.

So I’ve decided to make a game-time decision. To see how the show goes. What goes on during the rehearsal, the sound check and the performance. That will be part 2. Part 3 will be the results I get from performing live. I’ll share numbers, and take a look at how this all felt and how it will drive my next actions.

For now, I’m going to be authentic. I’m going to share this post. I’m going to let people know that this show feels bigger than me, that it is bigger than me. So much so that I’m not afraid of hitting a wrong note or messing up a lyric. For the first time I am truly trusting the songs, and the musicians, and the process, and the fans. I’m trusting it all and am focusing all of my energy not in stressing about ticket sales but on replacing that stress and desperation with grace.

Stay tuned….

Hello and happy fourth quarter!

Tis the season for preparing holiday cards! And this probably doesn’t mean licking stamps any more. I’ve seen so many great digital holiday cards in the past few years and they are a wonderful way to not only spread holiday cheer and remind your past clients, fans, and customers that you exist, but they are a great way to showcase your brand.

Your branding and all of the assets you’ve created (graphic logo, sonic logo, choice colors, fonts, any branding videos, about-page introduction animations, etc etc) should be aligned such that the purpose and mission of your company (and you as an individual) are expressed in the branding. This leaves tons of room for you then to provide value, engage with your past and potential customers, and present opportunities. You don’t need to spend any time explaining who you are as a company and what you are up to…. this is the purpose of good branding. Holiday cards are a PERFECT way to get your brand out there.

Here’s the brander’s guide to a perfect digital holiday card:

1) Include your graphic and sonic logo (don’t have one? No problem! Email me to get yours)
2) Keep it short, sweet and simple (usually between :05 and :30)
3) Incorporate a graphic element of your brand- either a font or a color- to nod to your branding, without hitting them over the head. (This may look like having your signature blue as the sky, or the greeting in your corporate font)
4) Be creative! Digital cards are an opportunity to show off your company’s creativity and uniqueness as well as show a different side of your brand. Don’t be afraid to invest in a creative animator or graphic house to create this for you.
5) Make sure to budget for custom music to show off your company’s holiday side, without being predictable, cheesy, generic, or off-brand. Simple graphics, like a logo faded in with “Happy Holidays” can make a lovely holiday card if it’s scored well. The visual and audio together should support each other and your brand’s purpose.

Elaborating on #5: as you embark on your holiday greeting card creations, consider skipping the typical jazzy bell version of jingle bells to score your animation and choose to go custom- incorporate your brand’s identity into the sound of your card. (And yes, we can always add bells). If you haven’t considered creating a digital card or making a video, the process is simple and I’m happy to guide you with the visuals as well. If you’ve already created your card, let me know and we can make the music support the holiday cheer as well as your brand (I’m fancy like that).

Hey there. If this hits a nerve, resonates in any way, let me know. I’d love to hear what you think and where you are in finding a balance between rushing and waiting…

I used to be in a rush ALL the time. Probably because I had this innate understanding of my internal clock. As a female, we’re reminded of it constantly. “How long have you been married? Oh, that’s a long time. Any kids soon? You’re not getting any younger”. And as a musician I used to be told only young artists get developed, found, and famous.

Both are poop, I know that now. But in my late twenties, I was racing a clock I had created in my head: my success clock. And the clock won. I rushed through making albums, releasing them, funding them. I didn’t give songs time to breathe, nor myself time to edit, to revise, to revisit. I developed an intense anxiety problem.

At the same time, I was waiting. Constantly waiting to really take the plunge. To declare what I really wanted. I was waiting for someone to “discover” me. I was waiting to commit. I was waiting for something else, outside of myself, to give me signs and cues as to what to do next. Where to go next. None of this helped my anxiety.

Enough rushing. Enough waiting.

Taking the bull by the horns, declaring what it is you want, and working with a steadfast focus and intention has become the balance for me. Success is not a someday thing. It’s a now thing. And getting clarity on your definition of success is what will define the steps you take today. Not rushed, just steady, effective actions that will get you moving down the path you have chosen. (Guys, this is one of the huge results people who take my MX4 course receive- I’ve got a few slots open for the next one, shoot me an email if you want in!)

Intention is one of my favorite words. Without it, I am lost, I am guessing, I am rushing, I am waiting.

For the first time,with any project, I took my time with my new single, “Inevitably”. It was based on an idea I had for a score I did for College Humor years ago and even though I got hundreds of people asking for the song, I just couldn’t’ figure out how to turn it into a full song from a small 4-bar motif. I called my friend and collaborator Cameron Ernst and he got me through the block. Having a single for a record that didn’t exist yet was empowering… I had somewhere to go.

I decided to film a music video while I was in Europe July 2014. So many things went wrong with that trip and the video turned into what a good friend called a “masterbatory solo artist video” which totally grossed me out (in many ways). I decided to call in another collaborator, Cyndi Harvell, to take a look at the edit. She provided so many valuable ideas, including developing the storyline to include vignettes of other people looking for and almost missing out on but inevitably finding love. I loved this idea. Over the next 10 months, I continued to film various vignettes. In no rush, I posted the video to my collaborators and waited for the right time to release it, which turned out to be this week. (Of course I’m posting it here for you!)

It’s the calmest I’ve ever felt about a release. Like I wasn’t rushing for the sake of rushing, and I didn’t wait for any fears or insecurities to quiet themselves- I was simply finishing it, as the project was meant to be done. With intention, with integrity, with partners and with support. I wasn’t afraid of feedback (gross as it could be) and I wasn’t afraid people wouldn’t like the song. I just needed to finish this song the right way once and for all.

I’m now taking that peace and perseverance, and bringing into all aspects of my career. I’m curious to see if this is a phase, or if this relaxed but purposeful mode of operating is sustainable. After all, I was looking for some new results, so I had to try to take new actions.

Leave a comment below and let me know- how have you found balance between rushing and waiting? How do you reduce anxiety? What’s a project you felt was completed in the perfect amount of time? Post a link! I want to see!

If you enjoyed this article, got any sort of value from it, please share it AND consider becoming a patron on Patreon… this way I can keep writing the goods and providing it for free. I love helping artists, so help me help you. (Is that from a movie? I think so).

What’s in a Gig? Letting Curiosity Lead

Clear the Energy: Why You Need An Emma

Work-from-home design decisions

What’s The Best Business Branding Tool? Female Empathy.

The Cool Factor

11 Free Marketing Tools Every Musician Needs

A Day In The Life of A Music Maker

9 Things I Just Learned About Music & Success

16 Quotes To Get You Outta Bed

Shifting the Money Talk

Why We Never Fail

Living on Gigging

The Perfect Pitch (Getting a Yes)

Enter new house.

Enter Emma.

Here’s what I learned about using and clearing energy:

How to be a contribution

1. Declare your purpose in the world

2. Pursue a career that you love

3. Share what you’re passionate about

4. Be expensive and be generous.

How to become successful

1. Live wherever you are inspired

2. Say yes to everything that is in line with the purpose you’ve declared for yourself and your life

3. Diversify

4. Create your niche

5. Fake it until you make it

6. Make ideas reality

7. Be human and interact as such

How to deal with unpredictability

1. Give up trying to control the future

2. Make future-thinking decisions

3. Know what you have, what you spend, what you need

4. Have integrity

5. Be flexible in planning

How to be a compassionate human being

1. Treat others as you’d like to be treated

2. Be what you’re committed to

3. Embrace the differences between genders

4. Be open to new connections

5. Give up the need to be right all the time

6. Be great with people

7. Be open-minded.

8. Don’t be afraid of endings

How to be good at being successful

1. Define your version of “success”.

2. Do more of what works and less of what doesn’t

How to mess it all up

1. Lose track of your commitment

2. Compare yourself to your friends/idols/past self

3. Throw your money away

4. Don’t acknowledge the small steps

5. Don’t be responsible for yourself

The Venue

Promotion

The Music